• Ranya

Preparing to be wives and mothers

Updated: Mar 15

Shalom Sisters and welcome back on my blog.

It is obvious that most of us in their younger years want to become wives and mothers one day.

Some of us dream of being wives, mothers and keepers of the home.

The question is what are we supposed to do in the meantime until we get married? It is clear that our culture pushes young women to go to college and have a career. Our culture basically idolizes going to college and becoming career women. I personally had times where I struggled with that, I questioned my goals of wanting to become a mother and wife because I feel pressured. I felt like, this is not enough. I felt like I would disappoint everyones expectations of how my life is supposed to look like. But you know what? Now I know it was wrong to think like that. The lies of the enemy tried to convince me to pursue what the world pursues. But my nature already tells me, that I can't handle the pressure in the world. I can't handle living a life that focuses on things that will have no meaning for God's kingdom.

Sisters, I want to encourage you: if your goal is to be a mother and wife one day: KEEP THAT GOAL!

Wait upon the Lord. We may not know His timing and maybe His will for some of us might look different. But the Most Highs will for the majority of women is to be married, to bear children and guide the home.

You probably ask yourself what you are supposed to do in the meantime and how you can stay productive until you are married.

The answer is we can already make sure to learn everything and to know how to keep a home. No matter where we live. Whether we live with our parents, alone or in a dorm room, we have a home that we need to take care of. We basically already run a home, if we are married or not. We need to keep our home tidy and clean. We can learn the skills of homemaking and practice homemaking. We can learn to already create an atmosphere where we invite the Holy Spirit to be in it. Our homes should be a place of hospitality and ministry. Not just for us but to anyone who comes into our home.

More things to learn and to do in the meantime:

- keep a clean and tidy home

- learn about nourishing food

- research how to be healthy and how to eat healthy

- learn about natural cures

- learn how to make good food, to feed people that come into your home and to provide your family with cooked meals

- learn how to save

- learn how to organize

- decorate your home

- serve the people that already live with you (parents, roommates, children)

- learn sewing or crocheting

- learn to buy groceries for the whole family

- learn to fold clothes like a pro

Most important: have a heart of service! Become a servant! Get rid of the selfishness and everything that could make you a person that nobody wants to be around 24/7. Pray for the Father to change your heart and make you become the woman that serves her husband and children. If we want to become wives and mothers one day, we need to prepare our hearts before we start a family! That's very important because we want to be ready and have our personal attitude problems solved out before we enter a marriage. We need to ask the Father to truly change our hearts and our selfish attitude so that we can become women who love to care for others and meet other peoples needs. This might sound weird to the world, but as daughters of Yah (God) we follow the footsteps of our Messiah and God's Son Yeshua and we deny ourselves.

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves." Philippians 2,3

You can always practice hospitality by inviting people into your home. You will start to learn to prepare your home and serve people by doing that more often. You will actually start to love it if you truly embrace your femininity and your love for people. You will automatically keep your home clean consistently if you know that you invite people more often.

Now a topic that most young women barely think of when preparing for marriage and becoming a mother. Career.

Don't be stuck in something you can't quit when you get married and become a mother. Your job shouldn't be more of a priority than your family. your career must not stand in the way of your family and interfere with decisions. Do not make college or your career an idol.

Some women need to work, yes. That's fine since not every family can live from one income. But you work to provide for things that you need, not to have a second lifestyle and a sphere that you are in besides your family.

If you already play with the though to stay at home full-time, make wise decisions now, that won't be a burden to you when you get married and have children.

Jobs where you can care for children are great jobs that prepare you for the family life! Nursing, and teaching at schools are also jobs you can practice in the meantime. I study to become teacher because I think this is the only feminine job that allows me to take care of children and teach them. (It would be better if it wasn't for the school system and the hard time in university). But consider jobs that are feminine and productive for your future.

Wait on the Most High, read your bibles, get inspired by proverbs 31, work on yourself to become a godly woman that is a blessing to a man. I believe that we have to care for our future marriage before we get married. This means:

- prepare to be a godly woman

-prepare to be a soft and gentle woman

-prepare to be a mother

- keep yourself pure

- pray for your future husband

- have boundaries, so you don't waste yourself on men who do not strive for a godly marriage

- learn about what a real man of God is

- Learn about children, take care of other peoples children, learn to love and care for them

- get rid of masculine traits and feminist attitudes that could be toxic in your marriage

- learn to respect men again. The world and feminism have thought us to hate men because they are all 'bad' but this is a lie, there are godly men who love women and protect them

Lastly, don't do all these things just for God to send you a husband! These are good works that you do for the Lord, but will help you to be prepared and less overwhelmed for when the time has come. We have to depend on God's timing but He gave us an instruction to learn to become women he wants us to be, even in our singleness. Being this diligent woman with the heart of a servant is something all of us need to work on because we want to honour our Heavenly Father and please Him with living sacrifices.

"and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." Ephesians 5,2

Be blessed sister! :)

Ranya xx

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