• Ranya

The immoral woman - Modesty

Updated: May 9

'I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me. ' Galatians 2:20

The W-Questions

A sister whom I respect very much asked herself the W-questions on the subject of modesty. I have to say these questions are really helpful in examining yourself as it can be very overwhelming in faith for many women to reflect on modesty. We need to be clear about why we want to be humble and modest. Do we want it because we have to? Or do we want to be like this because we have understood that we have to discard certain qualities because they do not please God and therefore no longer please us! When we understand why we do or don’t do certain things, we are much better able to examine ourselves and allow our heavenly Father to transform us.

  • WHO do I want to please?

  • WHO am I doing this for? ( Am I doing it for myself, for others or for God?)

  • Who gets the honor? (Me? others? God?)

  • WHAT do I achieve with it? (What's the goal with Modesty?)

  • WHY do I want to do this? (What is the purpose of my decisions?)

We are different from the world

All questions are related to each other. With regard to our own clothing, we should ask ourselves why we (want to) wear what we wear. Do I want attention and validation from other people? Am I trying to fill a void or cover a need of my ego? Or do I want people to see me and realize that I don't look like everyone else because I am set-apart, a daughter of God? When we, as the church of God, look like the world, conforming to the world and not different from it, there is only opportunity in conversation to tell others who we are, what we believe in and who our God is.

Isn't it much more valuable if people can already tell from our appearance who we are inspired by? It's not about being noticed or trying to hide. But we are to make a difference and be “holy”. What does it mean to be holy?

"holy", kodesh comes from the word root "kadash". It means to be set apart for a specific purpose. As women of God, we should make a difference and not conform to the crowd.

'And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.' Romans 12:2

The perverted ideal of beauty

We all know how much pop culture and fashion of this time influences the way we dress. The world is shaped by women of this world who obviously do not pursue the same goal as we do as believers. Our goal is eternal life and communion with God. The goal of the unbelieving women or women who are not in serious discipleship is to live a self-centered life here, to get recognition and to always focus on themselves with whatever means they have. They want to give credit to themselves, not to God. It's always about presenting yourself as the centre of the world and standing out, no matter what it costs. Unfortunately, the women who set the fashion trends in today's world embody values ​​that are not in accordance with God's word. He did not intend for us to use our looks and feminine charms to seduce men to have lustful or even adulterous thoughts. God did not want us to show children a perverted image of the woman who only gets respect and recognition through presenting herself sexually provoking to the world.

The feelings and thoughts that women trigger in other people through their outward appearance can be unhealthy, perverted and sometimes very damaging.

Just as pornography portrays a false and unhealthy image of intimacy, social media portrays women in a perverted and false way. Some women even present themselves that way unconsciously. They simply don't know any better because it's being thaught to them. Influencers, celebrities and other women nowadays are the ones who set an example for younger girls.

These are the works of the enemy. He deceives people, he puts himself in the place of Christ and wants to bring values ​​into the world that should replace the values ​​of the Most High. "Anti" means "instead of".

We should stop fooling ourselves and understand that women don't expose themselves for themselves. Yes, I say expose. We are not talking about clothing that looks flashy or has a striking pattern. I speak from my own experience, because I, too, dressed for validation, which actually only caused negative feelings in other people. We are talking about clothing that exposes the woman's body and makes it visible to men, women and children in a sexual way. It’s now extremely normal to see parts of the body that were deliberately covered "a few" years ago. You want to be "sexy"... It has become a normal need of every woman not only to want to be sexually attractive for her husband, but for the whole world.

Certain allusions are made that belong in a marriage where such thoughts and desires have their place. For example, God wants the man to delight in his own wife and find her attractive. Anyone who knows the Song of Solomon in the Bible knows what we are talking about.

But society, which is manipulated by satan, abuses sexuality and sensitizes all people through this indecent appearance of women.

The immoral woman

'Who rejoice in doing evil, And delight in the perversity of the wicked; Whose ways are crooked, And who are devious in their paths; To deliver you from the immoral woman, From the seductress who flatters with her words, Who forsakes the companion of her youth, And forgets the covenant of her God. For her house leads down to death, And her paths to the dead;' Proverbs 2:14-18
'For the lips of an immoral woman drip honey, And her mouth is smoother than oil; But in the end she is bitter as wormwood, Sharp as a two-edged sword. Her feet go down to death, Her steps lay hold of hell. Lest you ponder her path of life— Her ways are unstable; You do not know them.' Proverbs 5:3-6
'For why should you, my son, be enraptured by an immoral woman, And be embraced in the arms of a seductress?' Proverbs 5:20
'That they may keep you from the immoral woman, From the seductress who flatters with her words.' Proverbs 7:5

We read, that the seductive woman speaks softly, abandons the companion of her youth, and forgets the covenant of her God. Men who delight in her and enter her house ponder the path that leads to death.

We read that the steps of the temptress tend towards the realm of the dead. She is walking an uncertain path that she does not know herself.

Sisters... do we want be that woman? Do we want to live these qualities that try to lure men of God to their deat? Seduction leads to the realm of the dead. God speaks a clear warning about the temptress (the immoral woman).

We should examine ourselves with what we do, say and even wear.

Think of Joseph and how he was seduced into sexual intercourse by Potiphar's wife several times. Because Joseph didn't respond, she accused him to her husband of having approached her inappropriately. We can clearly see that this trait does great damage. Do we want to express this behavior in our clothing?

We must ask ourselves: What feelings and thoughts do I want to create in those close to me?

Our Responsibility

We bear a great responsibility towards our neighbors with the way we walk and present ourselves. Of course, as daughters of God, we do not want to be the cause of brothers struggling with lust because of us and how we carry ourselves. We don't want to encourage sisters to feel jealousy, envy, or any other negative emotions.

Unfortunately, there is no excuse for not taking responsibility and saying that it is not our problem if others stumble because of our behavior and our appearance (morality is not just appearance, but a mental attitude).

We do have a responsibility if we are a stumbling block to others. We must learn to make a nurturing, healthy, and virtuous impression on people. Not seductive and destructive.

Modesty can be beautiful and feminine

The ideal of beauty is manipulated and perverted by the adversary. We already know that since we conform to the beauty of Scripture, we should not conform to the beauty standards of this world.

'Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. ' I Peter 3:3-4

Modesty and propriety reveal the attitude of a woman who lives to give glory to God.

My dear sisters, our fellow human beings need to recognize God's character in us. It changes our inner being, which then affects the outer appearance as well.

However, the passage in 1 Peter 3:3-4 is misunderstood by many.

Yes, our beauty should come from within. Now that we have put off the old person and allowed the Father to transform us through Christ, we also stop being influenced by indecent fashion trends.

When it says that our adornment should not be outward, not braiding our hair and putting on gold jewelry or clothing, it doesn’t mean that we are no longer allowed to wear these things! On the contrary, it becomes clear that it was a common practice for women to groom themselves, to put on jewellery and to dress up. The author emphasizes much more that our beauty does not depend on these things! The external things emphasize our femininity and differ us from men. But they are ephemeral, not permanent, and do not constitute the true beauty, which is from within, imperishable, and increasing with age, as we read about Sarah (1 Peter 3:5-6) and see in Titus 2.

Dress up nicely, be feminine and take care of yourself if you want to do that! Just don't forget what the foundation and source of your beauty is.

However, dress in a manner that gives God the glory! We do not give glory to God when we expose, provoke and embody something that does not fit the character of a godly woman.

When you look in the mirror, remember who you want to represent. We must examine ourselves. When we have trouble allowing ourselves to be changed, we can ask the Father to examine our hearts and change us. If we ask him for truth, he will show it to us. But it is up to us and whether we are willing to live in obedience.

"Charm is deceitful and beauty fails, but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised." Proverbs 31:30

Let us walk in the fear of God, embody our love for God and be humble in our femininity.

God willing, I will talk about feminine clothing in another post and how we can dress feminine, beautiful and modest independent from fashion trends.

God bless my dear sisters! xx

118 views0 comments